Cancer Journey: Mind Battles

The Cancer Journey… a rollercoaster of mixed emotions, never-ending stresses, anxieties and uncertainties, but also an eye-opener for some.

Battling cancer is a big word. What people don’t talk about is when you are on the other side of the cancer battle, you are left with a forever altered life and conflicting thoughts. Thoughts are fighting against each other. One minute you are positive, the other you fall into the worries, fear and negativity.

Something they don’t tell you is that the big part of the fight is after everything is “done”.

What if it’s not over. It could very well not be over. What if something shows up on my next scan? Can I do this again? Can I survive this again? How do you live with the constant fear and worry? Well, you put one foot in front of the other and you walk. You take it a day at a time. You are still scared, but you have no choice but to move forward. You get all those conflicting thoughts. Your mental health takes a huge hit. You try to find ways to cope with it which isn’t easy.

Today is the one-year mark since I started treatments. April 26, 2021, was my first chemotherapy treatment. During the past year, the most important thing was to spend every moment I could with my son and husband and make memories.

Being there for my son’s 2nd birthday meant the world to me.

Recovering from each treatment and finding the energy to do everything I did last summer was a challenge, but when you don’t know what the near future holds and you fear you won’t be there for them, you do what you can to make things work. You push through it with a smile.

Something I’ve learned this year and it is still a work in progress is to enjoy the time you have now with the people you love, focus on what truly matters and enjoy it to the fullest by living in the moment and taking it one day at a time.

Your life is worth fighting for! Everyone needs to remember that and although it might feel lonely and unbearable at times, you’re never alone and you need to push through, mostly for yourself but also for your family that needs you.

I survived the treatments and the surgery but now is the real work. Accepting the person I’ve become, getting back into physical shape because I have never been in this bad of shape in my life, continuing to learn to live a day at a time, working on my stress and anxiety, enjoying life as it comes, creating good memories and of course… keeping smiling and move forward with the faith that things will be just fine.

Life is fragile and not to be taken for granted. Be nice to yourself.

2 responses to “Cancer Journey: Mind Battles”

  1. Yes even when your an empty nester , retires in a new prov getting MBC Told u were NED but also have to stay on the meds to inhibit the growth . When other s are cancer free and no mores need to be done ?
    WoW I made it through the 2 years telling the GPO and Onco Id like to try another drug here is the name I don’t want Osteoporosis feeling the hump and who was willing . But the GPO refused got nasty .
    My own GP alicated what I wa feeling but it my body .Telling her The GPO looked for blame , bullying me , he was disrespectful and she read his report to me in parts ! He is rigid and I have another 5 years with him he said ! Ugh not that I am grateful but what is he going to do that I don’t already taking my blood labs every month for results with low levels he says are normal to be low . Bc.my bone marrow uses my cells to heal me and so far thes 2 drugs are working . But when other here’s are free of treatments I still have to take mine . So this GPO says bc there is a reoccurence the drs will always see u as MBC . And he almost said we will see during thes 5 years .
    I had this conversation in Dec 2020 with my wonderful Mac Dreamy with my daughter in V ictoria and the 2 year prognosis to die . I am past that but I guess this GPO had to tell me about reoccurence . What a bummer eh , man ! 🏄‍♂️

    Liked by 1 person

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